


Final Wish

by InkRanOut



Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Prison, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 23:07:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14658111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkRanOut/pseuds/InkRanOut
Summary: Aftermath of Julian Devorak's capture."He smiled. And looked happy.Even in that cold cell, chained, confined, fated to die soon. He looked happy.My heart ached when I saw that smirk.He got up from the small, wooden bed, and walked as close to me as the bars would allow. Greeted me with an expression of jollity."





	Final Wish

**Author's Note:**

> I shall play my part as a member of this fandom by writing angst. :3
> 
>  
> 
> Please enjoy~

After he was arrested, Julian stayed in prison two weeks.  
At night, he would be constantly awoken by nightmares. Whenever that happened, the guards called me to come see him, regardless of the time.  
I had personally asked them to do that and even got Nadia's permission to visit him whenever I had to.

  
Julian talked to me about his nightmares, he described what he saw and willingly discussed his worries. At that specific time of the day, the middle of the night, we would both forget where we were. How Julian was to be executed soon.  
Or rather, we knew, but it didn't feel like that much of a deal then.  
Because it was our moment, and nothing could interfere.  
We both knew that we were to be soon separated. We wanted to spend those last days in peace.

  
Even though it was him who was leaving, I think he pitied me more than himself.  
He even told me once. That he would rather die than be the one who is left behind.  
I don't know if I can understand this way of thinking, however, he appeared to mean it with all his heart.  
Until the very end, he viewed me as the pitiful one.  
"I'm sorry," he kept saying that. "I'm sorry I hurt you."  
And I wanted to tell him that it's okay, that he never hurt me, that it wasn't his fault, but I just couldn't.  
In the end, he never heard it from me.

  
Maybe I just didn't believe it back then. Perhaps I, too, blamed everything on him.  
Those words of reassurance never exited my lips, no matter how much I loved him.  
He still kept saying it. That he is sorry. He would start explaining his nightmares to me, then pause to apologize, and then just kept going.  
And I couldn't comfort him on that one. I let him apologize.

  
And so, on the day of the execution...  
...  
He didn't know it would be the day. He had forgotten.  
So when I visited him, it was morning. That was rather unusual, so he was pleasantly surprised to see me.  
He didn't have any nightmares the previous night and had slept well.  
He smiled. And looked happy.  
Even in that cold cell, chained, confined, fated to die soon. He looked happy.  
My heart ached when I saw that smirk.

  
He got up from the small, wooden bed, and walked as close to me as the bars would allow. Greeted me with an expression of jollity.  
"You're early today. I... I'm glad. I wanted to see you. I missed you."  
All I could do was nod slightly, in an attempt to keep my composure. It was no use; burning tears had already started running down my cheeks.  
The guards would be there any moment and it was my last chance to talk to him.  
But I couldn't bring myself to say goodbye.  
Goodbye is for when it's over. So if I didn't say it... would this last a bit more?  
I didn't want it to end. How could I let go? How could I ever let go of him?

  
"Ah... so it's today," he said. He sounded confident, proud, yet his voice was so weak and low when he spoke.  
I extended a hand to caress his face, but I never did.  
He took that hand that I wouldn't move, and kissed my fingertips gently.  
"I'm sorry."  
He said it again. And it hurt, like always.  
And I cried.  
I cried so hard that it hurt. My chest was on fire, my eyes were blurry, my legs had started to bend.  
"It's... It's okay, Julian! It's okay! Don't you apologize anymore... I'll forgive you, no matter what! One day, I know I will! So please... don't let your last words to me be an apology..."  
The pain spread to my throat, but I couldn't stop.  
"I'm sorry too," I continued. "I'm sorry I'm so selfish that I can't just forgive you now that you're still alive. But I promise, Julian, one day I will... no matter what... I will..."

  
Julian remained silent for a couple seconds, then chuckled. It soon turned into a loud, uncontrollable laughter.  
"W- What?!"  
I'm sure my face had turned red.  
He was suddenly laughing...  
Why was he laughing?  
Why on a moment like this?  
It felt somehow... familiar, relieving... like the time we passed at Portia's house that was so much fun. We never stopped laughing, we laughed so hard that our stomachs hurt afterwards. Just us three, without a single care in the world.  
It didn't last long, but I missed those times more than anything. If only I could turn back time...

  
"Ahaha... I... I'm sorry..." he eventually mumbled, still laughing. "Wait, you said no apologies. I take it back."  
He took my hand in his and squeezed it. "It's just... I'm so lucky."  
I wanted to say something and I could tell that he noticed. He was eagerly waiting for me to speak.  
But then we heard noise from the corridor.  
Voices and faint footsteps that kept getting louder.  
I wiped my tears as fast as I could and turned to Julian, staring deep into his eyes.  
No time to think. I just said it.  
"Julian Devorak, will you marry me?"  
He froze.

  
Two guards whose faces I recognized, having seen them around the palace a lot, walked in with heavy footsteps.  
He didn't have time to give me an answer.  
Perhaps he was afraid that any answer would expose our relationship. Then I would be in danger, as well.  
Soon, they took him away, and I stayed all alone in the small prison cell, feeling empty.

  
I joined Nadia and Portia shortly after, to watch the execution together with them.  
Did I want to be with him on his final moments, or was I just afraid of being alone now?  
I had a look around, trying to focus.  
Many people had gathered, a terribly noisy mob.  
A big part of the crowd was cheering, spitting and shouting swear words addressed to the doctor. Merely by looking at their expressions, I could tell they were dying to see him swinging from the gallows.  
The rest of them were quiet. Those were probably the ones who were very fond of Julian. The people who used to drink together with him.

  
As I watched Julian being led to the scaffold, I finally realized that everything was being taken away from me for good.  
And at that moment, all I wanted was to die before I had to see it happening.  
The doctor stepped on the scaffold, guards firmly placing the noose around his neck.  
Nadia gave the signal.  
It was just a few seconds before the lever was pulled that he yelled, as loud as he could:  
"Of course I will! I could never ask for anything more!"

  
And those were his last words, addressed to me.  
Even on his final moment, Julian fulfilled my wish.  
He married me.

That's all I wanted to say.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! :D
> 
> I would love to read your comments! Please go ahead and tell me your thoughts!~


End file.
